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Saturday, October 15, 2011

Funniest Kid Story For Mommy Blogger- Warts and All

Just another day in the life of single mother Laura. As a mother of two kids girl and boy, eight and nine respectively, I still giggle looking back. My usual after work mode was and still is, cooking in my kitchen, hearing  active & loud kids running around me, as my comforting smooth jazz plays over the radio. "Ten minutes till dinner kids, that is your dinner bell warning. Let's start the wind down process."  I dropped the white apron with a picture of my late father around my neck and tied the string around my waist.

Running circles around my upper living room into the kitchen, Ellie and Jacob did not heed my dinner warning to calm down. My sister and I chopped vegetables for the Caesar salad we were to serve.  We laughed as the kids made circles around us. Survivor of lung cancer, my twin sister Linda lived with us and helped me raise my two children with tender love and care.  She was coined by my kids at a very young age as "Auntie Mama."  She was then and  now a very integral part of our family circle.  Fourteen now, my son Jacob commented the other day when I said " Jacob you just called Auntie,  Mom, his response, It's the same thing, your both my moms. I felt so touched hearing him say what I already knew he felt in his sweet little soul.

Now it's time for the kids to set the table. I reached my hand onto Jacob's shoulder, and stopped him in his tracks,Woe there little horsey.  Time to set the table for dinner, and that goes for you too little miss Ellie. " Oh mom, do we have to?  "Yes, Ellie, you know that we are a team and that means we all do our part." As I looked down to the floor I noticed Jacob wearing two different socks on his feet. This was a common scenario seeing no reaction at all to having totally different socks. One sock long going up to his knee and the other a short sport sock covering only his foot and barely reaching his ankle.  I know I don't have to die on every mountain so I let it go.

Cheesy chicken was once again the hit of the week. Cheese drizzling out of a chicken breast filled with butter, bread crumbs and cream of mushroom soup. The only way this mom can get her kids to eat veggies is to hide them in a meal. Well it worked and as the kids said, " Tasty chicken mom."  " I'm glad you liked it kids, please clear the table and take it to the living-room for cuddle time."  Routine is so important for children, so this scene was common place at our house.

Table cleared, kitchen cleaned, we were ready to head into the living room for our nightly cuddle time to watch a special show.  As Jacob headed for the other room, he grabbed what he thought was the lip balm. Gliding it effortlessly over his lips and pursing his lips together, he noticed my reaction. "Mom, what?"  Jacob, what did you put on your lips I screamed as I ran from the kitchen sink over to him? "Mom, I just put lip balm on, why do you have that look on your face? Worried, I took the lip balm into my hand and read it out loud. Warning: This is wart medicine. Do not put this anywhere on the body unless there are warts observed. In case of accidental application on lips, rinse the lips with water until till medicine is gone. 

Well, I guess you know what Jacob and I were doing for the next half hour.  Here are some words I kept hearing over and over till that dog gone wart medicine was gone off my sons lips.  "Hot, hot, hot, burning, ouch, mom get it off."   Wart Gloss- Don't try this at home.-----


  1. Bless his heart! oh my goodness. Great write and now a great memory, but probably not so much for your poor baby boy! OUCH! HOT!

  2. Jo
    It does get our funny bone.

  3. I hate warts. Good luck with this one.


  4. Funny. I skipped the reading glasses and brushed my teeth with cortizone cream. Boy was that a rinse and repeat moment.