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Thursday, June 21, 2012

Young Love-Formal First Person

http://www.awriterweavesatale.com/2012/06/15/sandras-writing-workshop-hop-2/

Billy and I adored my dad's sauna and pool. We would sit for an hour or more in the sauna then jump into the pool at the Sea Horse Condominium.  We would wait for our lips to get real hot and wet. The kisses in that sauna were something of heaven. The feel of his lips touching mine so softly still make me shiver today. I remember the smell of the sauna coals. Meditative, simple and sexy were these weekly visits to the sauna for Billy and I. I bathed in the smell of his breathe. Clean, sensual and soft were his lovely kisses. I long for those days that I could touch him, feel him, embrace him.

1991 at Hazeltine golf course, those days of kissing in the sauna  would be gone forever. I look back and remember the sheer pain I felt when I heard the news. " A 27 year old man from Spring Park, MN was hit by lightening and died at the hospital after lightening went through his body." I remember shaking when I heard the news. I had felt the loss spiritually and intuitively before I even heard it broadcast over the TV News Stations.

That was a year of deep trauma, agony and loss. I am glad 1991 is over and I can now look back on the good times and the agape love Billy and I shared together. I can see his smiling face dipping down to kiss me still. I love you William John Fadell.

5 comments:

  1. Gosh, hard to comment on this one; clearly so close to you and painful. I’ve known my own similar losses. Well, not of a lover, but of a dear friend and then a relative, both who died suddenly, and far too young.

    Anyway, as to the prompt:) I would say, because this is so emotionally laden, it really is more “close” than “formal.” Doesn’t finally matter, as long as the voice is consistent one way or the other. To me, this is close because it sounds more spoken – sentence fragments here work because they convey the intensity of emotion: “Clean, sensual and soft were his lovely kisses.” And phrases such as “something of heaven” are the abstract, and thus very much heard more than “seen,” if that makes sense….?

    If you were to rewrite this, I’d stay with the “close” perspective, but add more details so we can see Billy, as well as you. Your surroundings etc. All that would make this moment all the more immediate and thus all the more memorable to the reader. Thanks for linking up, and come back to see if there are others who might link up tonight!

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  2. Laura,
    I miss him too, more than I than words can convey. He was one of the best men I have ever known. He was like a brother to me and his loss has touched many. RIP Bill and I will see you when it's my time. Wow, will we have a lot to catch up on.

    Linda (Twinner)

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  3. Really,really sorry.I don't have words to express my sympathies.May God give you courage!

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  4. Sorry for your lost, Laura ... My heart sadden when I read this ... Sigh! Hang on to those fond memories ...

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