My Stoop

My Stoop

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Sunday, August 22, 2010

The Whisper That Became a Roar - Listen While You Read- I did not make this video.  This was my empowerment song.

My life with you was stagnant and sad

Seeing your anger, most everything made you mad

The evil energy in the house one could cut with a knife

Living with you was so oppressive devoid of any light

I tried to hide it from the children, but to no avail

They saw your violence, and watched your spit sail

You held them captive so I would go mad

You coward, somehow you rationalized it would not make our kids sad

Your yelling was penetrating, we thought it would never end

Through the roof, our nerves you would send

Your words were so confusing, I got dizzy and felt like I was in hell,

You would follow me around the house, I finally fell

The letter of our demise shown to our kids

I only found it accidentally and hid

You were planning at christmas to blow us away

Our daughter only three told me in dismay

Mom, why does dad say we'll die on Christmas and then all come back?

I slept in their rooms, both of my kids, for weeks on my back

I tried ever so hard to act calm for you

When your older, you'll understand why mom felt so blue

Once the judge ordered him out it got worse

He would creep up behind me and suddenly lurch

Why are you afraid he would say with a grin?

You have fear issues and why are you so paranoid, and lift up my chin

He would trance like, hypnotize the kids and put them on the table

His eyes would glass over, and to move they were not able

Till I told him I would film him and show a judge for to see

He'd say I had skeletons in the closet and the judge would take them from me

I acted calm as if I were not afraid, of the one thing I could not lose

My beautiful children, the best thing I have ever done

My treasured daughter and my son

I can't believe I used to love this monster, who was he?

The judge moved him out of the house, But we had paid a grand fee

Remember when you'd follow me on the steps of our room, you would tell and pronounce to me, I had chest pain, that I was having a heart attack, God I had to leave

You kept coming at me till I had to run out of the house just to breathe

My God I believed you, You scared the life out of me,

I could not talk, nor think straight, My legs felt like they would fall from underneath,like spaghetti,

You used to seem beautiful, not ugly and even your face,

My therapist claimed, this is the worst classic case

I am not bitter

I am free

I am so happy

My life right now is for my kids, not me

You taught me a lot

What to look out for

My soft whisper has now become a roar

A wolf in sheeps clothing, but now I have my life back,

God has healed us, our lives are on track

Freedom oh sweet freedom, I do so love you

Thanks to all those that helped me through this, you were my strength and my glue,

I have my life back now, I thank you for loving me

Life is a gift, peace is what we now see

Thank you God for letting me have the courage to leave the strife

Not much can bother me now, I feel so grateful, and the world is our oyster, This is our new life!!!

You taught me a lot

What to look out for

My once soft whisper, Is forever a loud roar


Thursday, August 12, 2010

A Storms a Coming

I grew up on Lake Minnetonka. I love storms. When I was growing up, I loved to watch the storms come in from the lake, from my sliding glass door. As ferocious as a storm can be, I loved the atmosphere of excitement that came with it. We would watch the storm rattle our glass door off our deck. I still dream of storms coming in exactly like that.

Tonight as I sit here and hub, a severe thunderstorm warning is a coming. I love it. My son is laying on the couch next to me and the rest of my family is up in their rooms sleeping. I am awaiting the storm. I love to hear the news buzzing about the weather and all that goes with it.

My dear father, John Anthony Rogers was an airline pilot for NorthWest airlines. He knew so much about clouds since he had to fly through them. Let me define the types of clouds that are in our sky.

Cumulonimbus Clouds- Again, my darling dad would teach us kids that cumulonimbus were the thunder clouds. These are the dense and puffy dark clouds that are in the sky before a severe storm. My dad would say " Kids, remember these cumulonimbus by saying this " Cumulonimbus, bumpus o lot us." How could we forget that? These clouds were mean and in the airplane they bumped us around a lot.

Cirrus Clouds- Cirrus clouds are thin and whispy like. Sometimes they are referred to as the "mares tail." They all connect together and at times look like one big thin cloud. I refer to these clouds as my " angel clouds".

Stratus Clouds- Stratus clouds are low lying clouds. These clouds are the ones that sprinkle rain or mist. Fog is a low lying stratus cloud.

There is something so mysterious, so awe inspiring about a good storm. I think it is that cozy feeling I get when my family is safe in our home and the storms a brewing.

Dark you may be, and safe are we

Your mystery envelops me, you are so complex

Natures paint brush, goes black,green,yellow

God has me in awe, what now,

It went from fierce to mellow

Wind whips fast,furious then slow,

where are you now, where did you go

Pop up storms how tricky are thee

Branches down, roofs fly, the birds, they flee

Brew dirty storm throwing all debree

When you are done, the rays peek through

Rainbows and hope, Natures beauty is free