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Sunday, August 22, 2010

The Whisper That Became a Roar

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_MtqU20lWqM&feature=fvsrMy - Listen While You Read- I did not make this video.  This was my empowerment song.

My life with you was stagnant and sad




Seeing your anger, most everything made you mad



The evil energy in the house one could cut with a knife



Living with you was so oppressive devoid of any light



I tried to hide it from the children, but to no avail



They saw your violence, and watched your spit sail



You held them captive so I would go mad



You coward, somehow you rationalized it would not make our kids sad



Your yelling was penetrating, we thought it would never end



Through the roof, our nerves you would send



Your words were so confusing, I got dizzy and felt like I was in hell,



You would follow me around the house, I finally fell



The letter of our demise shown to our kids



I only found it accidentally and hid



You were planning at christmas to blow us away



Our daughter only three told me in dismay



Mom, why does dad say we'll die on Christmas and then all come back?



I slept in their rooms, both of my kids, for weeks on my back



I tried ever so hard to act calm for you



When your older, you'll understand why mom felt so blue



Once the judge ordered him out it got worse



He would creep up behind me and suddenly lurch



Why are you afraid he would say with a grin?



You have fear issues and why are you so paranoid, and lift up my chin



He would trance like, hypnotize the kids and put them on the table



His eyes would glass over, and to move they were not able



Till I told him I would film him and show a judge for to see



He'd say I had skeletons in the closet and the judge would take them from me



I acted calm as if I were not afraid, of the one thing I could not lose



My beautiful children, the best thing I have ever done



My treasured daughter and my son



I can't believe I used to love this monster, who was he?



The judge moved him out of the house, But we had paid a grand fee



Remember when you'd follow me on the steps of our room, you would tell and pronounce to me, I had chest pain, that I was having a heart attack, God I had to leave



You kept coming at me till I had to run out of the house just to breathe



My God I believed you, You scared the life out of me,



I could not talk, nor think straight, My legs felt like they would fall from underneath,like spaghetti,



You used to seem beautiful, not ugly and even your face,



My therapist claimed, this is the worst classic case



I am not bitter



I am free



I am so happy



My life right now is for my kids, not me



You taught me a lot



What to look out for



My soft whisper has now become a roar



A wolf in sheeps clothing, but now I have my life back,



God has healed us, our lives are on track



Freedom oh sweet freedom, I do so love you



Thanks to all those that helped me through this, you were my strength and my glue,



I have my life back now, I thank you for loving me



Life is a gift, peace is what we now see



Thank you God for letting me have the courage to leave the strife



Not much can bother me now, I feel so grateful, and the world is our oyster, This is our new life!!!



You taught me a lot



What to look out for



My once soft whisper, Is forever a loud roar



WeeeeHeeeeeeeeeeee

2 comments:

  1. Love your poem (and blog!). I once had to get a protection order for us...and 'he" came anyway. thankfully , I had changed the security password on my alarm system!
    So glad to see a happy ending for you! No,wait....a new beginning!
    thanks for visiting my new blog.
    Love,Louisiana Bayou Lady

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks so much for stopping by jackie. I am so glad to follow you. Thanks for the nice comment on my poem.

    ReplyDelete